Sometime in recent years I finally came around to the value of flossing my teeth daily. I’d known it was important for much of my life and had never found a way that worked for me to maintain a consistent routine.
I committed to prioritizing flossing as part of my oral healthcare and bedtime routine around the time we were making our way through my parents’ belongings after my mom died in July 2023. We have actually not finished that process/project completely, as life happens and we’ll get there eventually.
While sorting through their stuff we came upon many large quantities of items such as dental floss, because my dad (who died in July 2021) liked to stock up on things, in part to get the deals for buying in bulk.
So, when I started flossing regularly, I was amused by the volume of dental floss containers that I had inherited (including various brands and some with mint flavor). I knew I’d eventually run out and have to buy my own, while realizing it would be awhile.
Well, that time has come. This week, three years after my mom’s death and five years after my dad’s, I finished the last container. It’s another bittersweet reminder of both what I’ve lost and what my parents left me through their deaths.
For much of their adult lives my parents modeled consistent and thorough oral healthcare. They both used electronic toothbrushes and flossed regularly. I admired that about them and it wasn’t until after their deaths (both at age 80) that I was motivated to start a similar practice.
When we moved back to Evanston in March 2022, Mom recommended their longtime dentist’s office and we started going there. I appreciate that our new dentist, some of the hygienists and office staff knew my parents. The team there are big proponents of using electronic toothbrushes and flossing and somehow they finally got through to me.
Also, Mom often talked about how the importance of oral healthcare had been impressed on her by her dad/my Grandpa Jack, who lost his teeth young on a basketball court (while he was a student athlete at Wanyesburg College, in the late 1930s/early 1940s, playing on their basketball team).
I continue to appreciate and think about the many ways I can keep my parents’ memories and legacies alive, as well as how I can still learn from what mattered to them. In addition to being a school teacher/reading specialist, Mom worked for social justice in her retirement. On top of being a journalist, Dad supported fellow recovering addicts in a 12 step program. They both prioritized flossing every day, for as long as I can recall.
I am grateful for all that my parents, who were also flawed (as we all are), taught and modeled for me in the 46 and 48 years I got to spend with them on this earth. I learned a lot from what they did well and the things they struggled with.
As one of my wise Axe cousins, C, is fond of saying, “what is remembered lives.”
My parents most definitely live on through me, my sister and our children/their grandchildren, as well as all those who are better for having known them.
Going forward, I will continue to think of Mom and Dad often when I brush and floss. And, now, it’s time for me to go shopping to buy some of my own.
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