Prone to…

by Kathy on March 8, 2012 · 11 comments

in Coping, Infertility, Journey, Life, Loss, Miscarriage, Pain

For the second time in two weeks I will likely be diagnosed with a urinary tract infection (UTI) later this morning at my primary care physician’s office.

I am prone to them.

I take cranberry pills every day (because I don’t care for cranberry juice), try to avoid the things that tend to cause them (including changing clothes/showering soon after exercising) and do the things that help me not get them as often (including drink lots of water).

However, in spite of that, I still get UTIs fairly often. Sometimes I will go months without a UTI and then at times I will get more than one in a month or two, like now. Maybe the antibiotic I took last week didn’t totally knock that one out or I am just unlucky/happened to get another one so soon after my last one.

I have friends who have never had at UTI and claim they don’t do half the things I do to try to avoid them. My doctor says that some women are just more prone to getting them.

So that got me thinking this morning about why some people are more prone to certain things than others.

In addition to being prone to getting recurrent UTIs, over the years I clearly have been prone to miscarriages/early pregnancy loss. I don’t think there is a connection, but I know plenty of people who have been able to have many children without ever experiencing a miscarriage or another type of early pregnancy loss.

Emotionally I feel that I am also more prone to some things that other people I know. I am prone to being overly sensitive at times. I have the tendency to take comments that people make/things people say to me very personally, even when they have the best of intentions and do not intend to hurt my feelings with their words.

I have come to a place in my life that I am able, for the most part, to accept that I am prone to certain things both physically and emotionally and do my best to deal with them.

As far as UTIs, I do what I can to prevent them and when I feel one coming on, I call for an appointment at my doctor’s office or go to a Minute Clinic at a pharmacy near us and hope to diagnosed and treated ASAP. I try not to dwell or get hung up on the fact that I am prone to them and just deal with them quickly when they happen.

Likewise, I have grown somewhat of a stronger backbone and thicker skin over the years, so other people’s words don’t hurt me nearly as much as they used to, but I also realize that my sensitivity goes both ways. I may take personally things people say and find that difficult at times, but I also feel that my level of sensitivity helps me to be there to support and care for others who are going through difficult, uncertain and/or painful times in their lives. I try to use what I have learned from my experience with secondary infertility and loss to be there for others who are struggling.

I know what has helped me during some of the hardest parts of our journey trying to build and expand our family. Though I get that what works for me, may not work for everyone else, I have found there seems to be some universal things that those going through challenging times in their lives appreciate hearing and receiving from loved ones. Appreciating and understanding that, I do my best to reach out to those who are hurting and give them support and words of comfort.

What are you prone to? How do you deal with the things in your life that plague you at times, but you do not have control over/the ability to change?

{ 8 comments… read them below or add one }

1 April March 8, 2012 at 1:08 pm

Oh, I’m sorry, UTIs are no fun. I used to be prone to kidney stones. For about five years I would get them up to two or three times a month. I’m down to once a year or so now, thank goodness.

I’m also prone to sensitivity, like you. I think sometimes that it’s because there are so many things that remind me of the worst times, that can be the only part of a statement that sticks with me, so I rehash and rehash trying to figure out why someone would say such a thing, even though I can objectively see that it wasn’t meant to hurt me, or that it wasn’t even directed at me. It’s just a trigger that I have to cope with the best I can. Some days I can cope better than others.
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2 Meg March 8, 2012 at 3:24 pm

I liked this blog entry, especially as it surprised me–in a good way. I liked how you moved from medical to emotional. Well, it must not be genetic, as I’ve maybe only had one UTI back in college. Sorry that they continue to come back for you. 🙁

Yes, I also suffer from infertility but I experienced it a very different way than most people I know. As you know, I found out in college that I was infertile when I wasn’t even trying to conceive. I was then able to tell my husband that prior to getting married and know that we’d adopt. This manifests itself very differently in a marriage than a long struggle trying to get pregnant.

On the non-medical front, I’d say tardiness–I always think I can do “one last thing” and then I’m late. Also procrastination (which is probably not a surprise to those who see my on fb all the time!) Seriously, though, while a fb break midday after caring for a toddler for seven hours is a good thing, spending her entire 2 1/2 hour nap online is not. So I’ve been working–and will continue to work–on that. Speaking of which, need to log off and get some things done! 😉
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3 Lori Lavender Luz March 8, 2012 at 4:04 pm

Blech. UTIs are no fun. I’m sorry you’re dealing with them.

For me, it’s food allergies. I’ve been told I’m just more sensitive than most people. Like it was a thing of honor. “A Stradivarius rather than a garden variety violin” one holistic therapist said. I have also heard the theory that people who are born early are just born sensitive, their nervous and immune systems not yet ready for prime time.

But I don’t think I was early.

Anyway, I have a history of thin skin, too. As I get older my boundaries get healthier. I am more capable of owning my stuff and more able to leave others’ stuff to them.

Hope you feel better soon. Have you checked Louise Hay’s book “You Can Heal Your Life” to see what she says about UTIs?
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4 LindaC March 8, 2012 at 8:29 pm

So sorry you are troubled by UTI’s. I had 1 several years ago and its no fun. Did you eat yogurt on your last round of antibiotics? As the antibiotics kill off the good bacteria too and maybe that is why a second one came on so quickly. Not a doctor but just a thought. I am prone to depression and infertility. Was diagnosed with chemical imbalance in my late teens and been on and off medication the duration of my life. I guess that is why I just did not suffer from baby blues and ended up with post partum depression. I was dx with PCOS when I was in my early 20’s and with my irregular menses and the need to be on Birth control pills doctors said it would be a very hard road to get pregnant. It was a journey and I was extremely blessed not to have to endure any pregnancy loss as with my depression it may have put me over the edge. So I think God knows the strength in people and what they can and can not endure in their lives. When I went through my last rounds of infertility treatment I went off my anti-depressants to my amazement I was not having bad bouts of depression. I was able to stay off of them my entire pregnancy as it was a concern of mine as what it would do to the fetus. I had anxiety but that was all because I finally conceived and had no clue what was in store. I was pretty nervous but never once got depressed or sad. I know God had his hand in it because once I got home from after my c-section the depression came back with a vengeance. I am now back on my medications and things are back to my normal. For me in dealing with issues, I seem to find that prayers and positive thinking works wonders. Music also helps me relax and cope when going through rough times.

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5 Elizabeth March 9, 2012 at 6:53 am

Those are tough questions! I’ll have to get back to you on that!

Sounds like you really know yourself. I hope your UTI clears up quickly.

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6 Ellen March 9, 2012 at 8:27 am

Hi Kathy -I used to be prone to UTIs too, until a doctor gave me a tip about 10 years ago, and I’ve only had 1 UTI since. “Never have sex on a full bladder.” Empty your bladder just before intercourse, which admittedly can spoil some spontaneity, but well worth it to me to avoid another dreaded UTI. Not sure if that’s already in your list of tips, but thought I’d share it just in case.
I’ll have to think about what I’m prone to… but wanted to throw this out there while it was fresh on my mind.
Hope this UTI clears up quickly!

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7 JustHeather March 9, 2012 at 1:33 pm

I’ve had my share of UTI’s too. Not fun. But something I learned years ago when they couldn’t seem to get rid of this constant string of UTI symptoms (after several different medications and an invasive procedure), was that I can cause UTI’s, or at least the very real symptoms of them, by my emotions and keeping them bottled up inside of me. I can tell when I’m stressed, mad at someone or some other strong emotion that I’m not letting out or at lest acknowledging to myself. Generally, once I figure out what is going on in my head, by the next morning my symptoms are gone.

Also, to tack onto what Ellen said, go pee immediately after sex.

Sorry you’ve got two UTI’s back to back. It makes my hands hurt just thinking about it.
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8 Emms March 23, 2012 at 4:58 am

I am also overly sensitive. I do ok sometimes, but not always!

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