Back again…

by Kathy on October 15, 2007 · 0 comments

in FET #1, October 15

One last post today…

I got two emails this afternoon from the husband/father of family that I know today.

One email was to tell me (and other of their family and friends who might not have heard already) that they recently suffered an ectopic pregnancy. Though I won’t go into details, this family has been through so much already related to pregnancy loss and infant death, that I was stunned and so saddened to receive their first email letting me know what had occurred over the past week or so and that the wife/mother is home and recovering as well as could be expected. Her right tube did rupture, she lost her right tube and needed a blood transfusion, but it is true that things could have been a lot worse (as we were frequently reminded after our ectopic, which will have been two years ago, this November) Please keep their family (they do have other living children) in your prayers. Thank you.

The second email was in regards to today being a national remembrance day for those who have lost children through miscarriage, ectopic pregnancy, stillbirth and/or infant death (Pregnancy & Infant Loss Awareness Day). I have been busy today and hadn’t really taken time to call to mind our three little angels babies who we lost respectively on 12-1-2004, 8-19-2005 and 11-4-2005. After reading their second email, I said a little prayer for our guardian angel babies and asked them to please especially watch over our little embryo right now and if it is meant to be, to help it’s little body and soul settle in for the long haul. The email that the husband/father sent, about this remembrance day, included this poem, written by a parent who had also lost a child and I found it to be healing to read and to contemplate on this day of remembrance:

To die one’s self is a thing that must be easy, & light of consequence;
But to lose a part of one’s self–well, we know how deep that pang goes,
we who have suffered that disaster, received that wound which cannot heal…
It is one of the mysteries of our nature that a man (or woman),
all unprepared, can receive a thunder-stroke like that and live.
It will take mind and memory months
and possibly years
to gather together the details
and thus learn and know the whole extent of the loss.

– Mark Twain, 1888, on the death of his daughter, Suzy Clemens

To all those out there reading this who has lost, or who is close to someone who has lost, an embryo, a fetus, a baby and/or a child, please know that my thoughts and prayers are with you today and your angel(s).

This has been a very emotional day for me, finding out about both the birth of our close friend’s baby girl and also learning of the ectopic pregnancy of another friend, while I continue to wait to find out if this current FET cycle is successful or not. I was literally composing my reply to the the first email from my friend/husband/father about their ectopic pregnancy, when my girlfriend called to tell me about the birth of her baby girl. Kind of ironic…

I leave you with my favorite quote about losing a loved one (of any age):

“What we have one enjoyed and loved deeply, we can never lose.
For all that we love deeply, becomes a part of us.”

~ Helen Keller

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